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    Top 10 Dreams Bloggers Don’t Want to Wake Up From…

    By dana | September 23, 2007

    blogging dreams

    1. Every single page and post in your blog have been stumbled by 5 or more top stumblers.
    2. You just received a letter from Google, and due to an error on their part, you were underpaid by $4000 on each of your last earnings checks.
    3. Several of your posts have made it to the front page of Digg, and your server is still kicking!
    4. Overnight the world has come to realize that Britney, Paris and Lindsay are boring, and business and marketing blogs are where it’s at. Thus, all the traffic from Perez and TMZ has been redirected to you…and your server is still kicking!
    5. Magically, all SPAM is real and you really have won the lotto, received 26 million dollars from the estate of a Nigerian business man and free Viagra, Cialis and ringtones for all!
    6. You just received several e-mails from blogger friends congratulating you for being linked to in posts from Problogger, CopyBlogger, John Chow and DoshDosh.
    7. Matt Cutts sent out an e-mail overnight letting everyone know that he was just punking everybody about the whole paid links thing, and from now on Pagerank will be updated in real time.
    8. In an unprecedented effort to regain international goodwill, President Bush and the Congress have come together to immediately instate free, worldwide highspeed wi-fi connections for all!
    9. All versions of Firefox, Internet Explorer, Safari and all other browsers render exactly the same all the time.
    10. You never get stuck trying to come up with a number 10 on your top ten lists!

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  • 37 Responses to “Top 10 Dreams Bloggers Don’t Want to Wake Up From…”

    1. Marty Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 10:16 am

      #10: With personalized search turned off a direct brande search for your name results in the Google organic #1 for the phrase “SEO Rockstar” as a result of your SEM friends Google bombing pranks

    2. YC Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 10:47 am

      At the rate you’re going, Dana, and with posts like this, you’ll be going head to head with Darren and John Chow pretty soon. Brilliant list - I had great fun reading this!

    3. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 10:56 am

      Marty, I love that one! I would also accept “SEO Goddess,” “Blogging Empress” or just taking down Perez Hilton and being named “Queen of all media!”

    4. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 10:57 am

      Ah, you’re the best YC, but don’t say stuff like that…that just sounds scary! :shock:

    5. shaun Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 11:23 am

      haha that’s funny, I wish i could get a 4k check from google, thanks for sharing! and if you got more good posts send them to me through SU i always need a break from studying :smile:

    6. Ad Tracker Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 11:26 am

      LOL!! Very good! But, shhhhh…..don’t wake me up! :grin:

    7. Lyndon Antcliff Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 1:57 pm

      Funny thing is, I do actually dream about blogging, but then I’m weird. :mrgreen:

      Great post, more please.

    8. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 3:03 pm

      @Shaun We miss you already…so don’t worry about me forgetting to send you posts :)

      @Ad I’d reply back to you, but I don’t want to disturb your rest and dreams of Adsense fairies dropping checks on your pillow :lol:

    9. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 3:04 pm

      Thanks Lyndon,
      I’m pretty sure we all dream about blogging in one form or another. Most of mine are more like dreams of walking the streets holding a sign that says will work for comments and stumbles :smile:

    10. DazzlinDonna Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 3:23 pm

      LOL! Love it. Certainly a lot better than most of my bizarre dreams! I’d be happy if even one or two of these would come true. :)

    11. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 3:38 pm

      Thanks Donna! It would be great wouldn’t it. Unfortunately, I think my best bet is probably that a Nigerian billionaire passed away and really did leave me $105 million dollars… :smile:

    12. Maki Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 4:49 pm

      I actually had a StumbleUpon nightmare the other night.. hard to describe or even remember what it was but it had to do with bug like creatures which multiply whenever someone somewhere presses a ’stumble’ button.

      I had to kill all of them with a curvy knife and gun I had in my hands. Weird huh? :)

      Nice post, Dana!

    13. Tinu Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 4:50 pm

      8 and 10 are magic. :)

    14. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 4:57 pm

      Thanks Maki! Freaky dream…I say call Michael Bay and turn that into a Hollywood blockbuster…Night of the living Stumbles, that’s lame, give me some time to work on the title :)

    15. WarriorBlog Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 6:18 pm

      If all SPAM was real, I be rich! Excellent post - made my day :grin:

    16. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 7:18 pm

      Wouldn’t we all Sean/Warrior, wouldn’t we all…except I should probably have added that all SPAM was real and winnings and gifts from SPAM are tax-free gifts :)

    17. LGR Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 8:30 pm

      That was great. Thanks for the laugh. I just wish #2 was true. I could use a bonus like that.

    18. dana Says:
      September 23rd, 2007 at 8:41 pm

      Thanks LGR! Probably unlikely, but you never know :)

    19. Meg Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 12:39 am

      I write my best blog posts in my dreams. The problem is that I can never remember them when I wake up :wink:

      Very funny list - well done Dana!

    20. dana Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 7:09 am

      I hear that Meg! I seem to always remember them long enough to wake up and feel really excited about them…and then, by the time I’m fully conscious, I’ve lost it!

    21. Chris Lodge Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 9:35 am

      Maki needs to cut back on the cheese…. :shock:

      There must be something in the water, as I had a Google dream last week when I dreamt that all my blogs had got a PR8 after Google had finally got round to updating.

      Well, logging on that day was a big disappointment…..

    22. Marty Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 9:39 am

      I ALWAYS dream about social media participation. It’s taken over my psyche making me a phreaky boi…

    23. dana Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 9:58 am

      Chris- those are the worst kinds of dreams aren’t they…the ones so real that you’re not quite sure until you check in with reality whether or not it was a dream or not…for me, it’s always a dream though :(

    24. dana Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 9:59 am

      Yes, but you’re a phriendly phreak Marty!

    25. Mohsin Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 11:04 am

      OK, I actually did dream about getting on Digg front page once *smiles nervously*

    26. Sebastian Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 12:06 pm

      Great wish list. :) I hope at least one of your dreams comes true. Well, not necessarily #10. ;)

    27. dana Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 12:18 pm

      @Mohsin It’s alright! You won’t be judged here :wink:

      @Sebastian Thanks! I’m really not sure which one I would wish the most :)

    28. Natasha Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 2:42 pm

      Great list Dana! Made me laugh out loud… then feel very geeky because I understood.

      Here’s hoping your dreams come true.

    29. CHESSNOID Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 7:00 pm

      Definitely every bloggers dreams. :lol:

    30. Brian Says:
      September 24th, 2007 at 7:41 pm

      This was great, I loved every item including #10!

    31. Aaronontheweb Says:
      September 25th, 2007 at 12:29 am

      Stumbled! Damn Dana, at this rate your blog’s going to be pretty popular soon!

    32. Around the Blogs and Back Again v3 | Lewis Empire Says:
      September 26th, 2007 at 6:16 pm

      […] Top Ten Dreams Bloggers Don’t Want To Wake Up From Here is a great list of things that every blogger dreams about. I’d also add to the list, #11 Every WordPress plugin you installed was updated perfectly and you didn’t need to search the web for your error message. […]

    33. Debo Hobo Says:
      September 28th, 2007 at 10:52 am

      Oh this was good…especially #10.

    34. Christine O'Kelly Says:
      October 19th, 2007 at 12:23 am

      Love this! Especially #4: “Overnight the world has come to realize that Britney, Paris and Lindsay are boring, and business and marketing blogs are where it’s at.” I don’t understand why most the world doesn’t find this stuff as fascinating as we do!

    35. Kent Schnepp Says:
      October 29th, 2007 at 11:13 pm

      Good stuff!

    36. Najlaa Says:
      December 12th, 2007 at 5:47 pm

      This is great, it’s one of the best blog posts I’ve ever taken the time to read.

      By the way, I stumbled upon this. ;)

    37. 22 of The Funniest Search Marketing Posts - KoMarketing Associates Says:
      April 30th, 2008 at 7:06 am

      […] Top 10 Dreams Bloggers Don’t Want to Wake Up From… “Overnight the world has come to realize that Britney, Paris and Lindsay are boring, and business and marketing blogs are where it’s at. Thus, all the traffic from Perez and TMZ has been redirected to you…and your server is still kicking!” […]

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